Love is Resistance
Updated: Jan 4, 2020
Love is Resistance
There was a long period of my life where I was filled with anger, jealousy, low self worth, resentment, and tension for the people who had hurt me, for the injustices in this world, and for myself. I had internalized the pain that was directed towards me, the pain I saw inflicted on others, and the pain that society and systems thrive on. But I slowly began to realize that anger, jealousy, low self worth, resentment and tension was weighing me down, like an anchor tied to my ankle.
I think of the so many others, and their communities, who wear anchors tied to their ankles.
Colonization brought with it anchors, and systematically began tying weights to the bodies of everyone it came across – aiming for the easiest target, the ones who could yet barely walk. My grandmother wore an anchor for ten years, during which she didn’t hear kind words, receive kind actions, see kind things. Her love was stripped away, until bare bones she wore the hate, anger and trauma of the ones who tied her down. Love is learned, through the love of those around us. Colonization stole away love and replaced it with fear. After ten years of residential school, my grandmother continued to wear her anchor.
I see our families and our communities now, today, who still carry that fear.
Anger, jealousy, low self worth, resentment and tension breeds loneliness, perpetual hurt, violence, abuse, harm, stigma, judgment, addiction, chaos, hopelessness, death.
In continuing to wear our anchors,
We hate our bodies.
We hate our identities.
We hate our sexuality.
We hate our weaknesses.
We hate our circumstance.
We hate ourselves.
We hate each other.
We hate our colonizer.
We are paralyzed.
And the colonizer continues.
The colonizer does not love, because the colonizer carries their own fear. Fear of their own weaknesses and self-doubt, that by giving into love, they lose power.
We can no longer rely on the colonizer. We can no longer continue to blame the colonizer.
In using blame, hate, anger, and violence to resist, we become our colonizer.
There is only one thing that can transcend fear – only one thing that can bring liberation.
We need to breathe love into ourselves, our families and our communities.
We cannot move forward unless we rid ourselves of the weights we choose to continue to carry. We, more than anything, need to learn to love ourselves and each other.
Love needs to be reclaimed.
When we love, the colonizer has no control, no hold, no power. We are free.
Love is the ultimate resistance.
Love the land.
Love the animals.
Love the ones who hurt you.
Love the other.
Love the different.
Love your weaknesses.
Love your mistakes.
Love your strengths.
Love your body.
Love the colonizer.
Love. Love. Love.
This is how we break free. This is how we heal. This is how we move forward.
This is how we resist. This is how we become who we once were.